This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
