Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
