i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize