Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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