Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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