that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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