Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize