You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
