I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize