you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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