We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
