I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
