the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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