They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
