I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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