Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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