my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
