You work out of a Hotel?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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