needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
