now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
