Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
