I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize