And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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