Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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