It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
why do cheetos always look like penises
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
