Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize