Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just want to make out with him forever
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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