I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
