her vagine was all disorganized.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
