Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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