i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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