And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
