At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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