Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
