No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
