Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
