I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
