so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
