Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize