So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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