i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
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