It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
