Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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