Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Randomize
