I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Randomize
