I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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