I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
