I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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