I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
