i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
