I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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